I do think if you whine on about negative things like illness..it makes you feel worse..
it just brings me down so this blog is going to be a bit pointless really..
ive got through by ignoring pain and such.. pushing on through it ..
enjoying the pleasures i have ..

i steep myself in my hobbies.... look out on a beautiful day.. cloud spot just small simple things....these are the things that bring me pleasure.. .
.things like a holiday would hold no excitement for me....
my brother went to miami.. the thought filled me with dread.. all those people milling about.. the big attractions...to me its all shallow.
if i shut my eyes i can see it all in front of me for nothing.